Laloo Jokes

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Laloo was in a plane with Sonia, a priest, a school student and the pilot. The engine developed trouble 

and there were only four parachutes. Sonia jumps first  saying that the nation needs her. Laloo jumps

next saying Bihar needs him badly. Pilot jumps next. The priest asked the student to take the last parachute and jump. Student replies. "Two parachutes are left. Laloo took my school bag and jumped!"

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While Laloo was visiting a village, he saw a herd of buffalos and wanted his photograph to be taken with

the herd. Press photographer obliged. But next day the picture appears on the front page with the caption. "Laloo with the buffalos. He is third from the left."

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Laloo was filling out a job application when he came to the question: "Have you ever been arrested?" He answered "no."  The next question, intended for those who answered the preceding question yes, was "why?" Nevertheless, Laloo answered it "Never got caught."

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The other day Laloo remarked to a friend, "I just finished a puzzle and it only took me five months." "Five months?" his friend asked. "That seems like an awfully long time to do a puzzle." "Not at all," Laloo explained. "The box says 6 to 12 years."

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A man died and was taken to his place of eternal torment by the devil. As he passed sulfurous pits and shrieking sinners, he saw a man he recognized as Laloo snuggling up to a beautiful woman.

"That's unfair!" he cried. "I have to roast for all eternity, and Laloo  gets to spend it with a beautiful woman."

"Shut up," barked the devil, jabbing him with his pitchfork. "Who are you to question that woman's punishment?"

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After much thought and consideration, Laloo Prasad finally figured out how to take at least some of his money with him when he died. He instructed his wife to go to the bank and withdraw enough money to fill two pillow cases. He then directed her to take the bags of money to the attic and leave them directly above his bed. His plan: When he passed away, he would reach out and grab the bags on his way to heaven. Several weeks after the funeral, Laloo's wife, up in the attic cleaning, came upon the two forgotten pillow cases stuffed with cash. "Oh, that darned old fool," she exclaimed. "I knew he should have had me put the money in the basement."

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Why do they bury Laloo Prasad under 20 feet of dirt?

Because deep down, he is a  really good man.

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A Rabbi, a Hindu and Laloo  were driving late at night in the country when their car expired. They set out to find help, and came to a farmhouse. When they knocked at the door, the farmer explained that he had only two beds, and one of the three had to sleep in the barn with the animals. The three quickly agreed.

The Rabbi said he would sleep in the barn and let the other two have the beds. Ten minutes after the Rabbi left, there was a knock on the bedroom door. The Rabbi entered exclaiming "I can't sleep in the barn; there is a pig in there. It's against my religion to sleep in the same room with a pig!" The Hindu said HE would sleep in the barn, as he had no religious problem with pigs. However, about five minutes later, the Hindu burst through the bedroom door saying "There's a COW in the barn! I can't sleep in the same room as a cow! It's against my religion!" Laloo, anxious to get to sleep, said he'd go to the barn, as he had no problem sleeping with animals.  In two minutes, the bedroom door burst open and the pig and the cow entered...

 

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